Klaatu Barata Nicto!

So the wife is getting pretty big lately... that is to say, even bigger than I have thought possible. This is a good thing, it means Maja is getting bigger and closer to coming out. I still get visions of Aliens bursting out the side, but I am starting to figure out how to tune those thoughts out.

I had to take off for a couple of days last week, and the night I got back, Aga couldn't get to sleep. The bundle of joy was doing a round of calisthenics all night long. Aga says that it was something she ate... I prefer to think Maja was just excited that Daddy was home.

Last night, I was able to feel Maja through the belly. And not the "I felt her kick" type of cuteness, this was in the league of "that is either the Baby's head or my Wife's kidney". I swear we should sell tickets to that show! Aga was a bit more creeped out than I was, which surprised me, I always thought she would be the tough one. That's right Maja, you Mother thought you were "Icky", Hold it against her baby-doll.

In reference to the last post about Aga being away and bed emptyness/naked mole rat tunneling, we have bought a king size bed. It wasn't so long ago that people could venture out into Oklahoma and plant a flag to claim a piece of land roughly the size of this damn bed (look up the Sooners... and read a book for Pete's sake!). We got a pretty great deal on a mattress/bed over at Ikea. And the coolest/most disturbing part? The mattress's name is Hasselback, just like the quarterback. So this just opens me up to a whole new line of gay jokes. I have the constant fear of blurting out "last night I slept on a King Size Hasselback", and that is where the mocking starts. Hell, the only reason you people think it's funny is because you have known me for longer than 5 minutes and realize that not only is that possible, it is pretty damn likely. I will give you a second to giggle and nod as you think about it.
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It's only funny because it's true.

So anyway, this bed is huge. We need an elaborate system is pulleys, cranks, and carrier pigeons just to get the alarm clock set. Yep we have made it to the big time, or so I thought. If pillows were gold, the Wife's side of the bed would be Fort Knox. She has more pillows than Kim Jong-Il has high heeled shoes. We took 3 hours to find the correct mattress, this girl was the Goldilocks of mattressdom. And when she finally finds one "just right", we get it home and within 24 hours it's too hard! So what do we have to go buy? A pillow top for our new mattress. So now she is quite literally sleeping on a bed of pillows, and I am sleeping on what is literally the area of less than a twin size bed. And the punch line is that when she goes to bed, 15 minutes go by as she jams a pillow into every nook and crevice she can find. And then when she finds the right combination, she tells me to turn off the lamp. Which is on Her side of the bed! So now I have to climb over the top of a somewhat whiny mountain of goose feathers to get at the light. And the down side to all this? When her water breaks, we lose about $324 in pillows right there.