I might just go crazy

We finally picked out a glider/rocker for the nursery but realized that we won't be around when it arrives here (GA) in 6-8 weeks and shipping to Green Bay would cost $150-$200 on top of that plus we would need to arrange for it ourselves and that's just something we don't want to deal with. So I've been calling stores in WI who carry the brand trying to figure out if they can even order it.
Well, every single one of them up there called me back saying that the style/fabric combination I'm looking for isn't available and the manufacturer just won't make it. What??? I saw this chair in person... I sat in it... it exists!! and that was after I had to convince them that the style we want also exists. The chair comes with hidden footrest option but we didn't want it and everyone tried telling me it's impossible to get it without. Whatever!
Anyway,after they finally agreed that the style is in fact available, they tried telling me it only comes in leather or microfiber which isn't something we want either, plus all of them quoted us $200+ then anyone else here in GA and I even called Chicago, Portland and California!
Jeff was willing to drive down to Chicago to pick it up but I gave it one more try and called Minneapolis... turnes out they can get the right combo for us for much less!! Yeah! so tomorrow, I'll be putting in the order and he will pick it up when it's ready :).
This is what we are getting in the fabric swatch below. This chair glides (no, really... it does! it's hard to tell, I know) and the back reclines at the same time and it's soo comfy.

It's cool to see them side by side

These are from week 15, 20, 24 and 28

28 week bump

Ok, I'm a little late on posting these but in my defense our camera cord is broken so I had to go to one of those "get your pics on a CD places" :(.
Anyway, here are some from last week (28 weeks)









I couldn't resist showing off our new stroller! A wonderful gift from my bosses. We can't wait to use it :)

Klaatu Barata Nicto!

So the wife is getting pretty big lately... that is to say, even bigger than I have thought possible. This is a good thing, it means Maja is getting bigger and closer to coming out. I still get visions of Aliens bursting out the side, but I am starting to figure out how to tune those thoughts out.

I had to take off for a couple of days last week, and the night I got back, Aga couldn't get to sleep. The bundle of joy was doing a round of calisthenics all night long. Aga says that it was something she ate... I prefer to think Maja was just excited that Daddy was home.

Last night, I was able to feel Maja through the belly. And not the "I felt her kick" type of cuteness, this was in the league of "that is either the Baby's head or my Wife's kidney". I swear we should sell tickets to that show! Aga was a bit more creeped out than I was, which surprised me, I always thought she would be the tough one. That's right Maja, you Mother thought you were "Icky", Hold it against her baby-doll.

In reference to the last post about Aga being away and bed emptyness/naked mole rat tunneling, we have bought a king size bed. It wasn't so long ago that people could venture out into Oklahoma and plant a flag to claim a piece of land roughly the size of this damn bed (look up the Sooners... and read a book for Pete's sake!). We got a pretty great deal on a mattress/bed over at Ikea. And the coolest/most disturbing part? The mattress's name is Hasselback, just like the quarterback. So this just opens me up to a whole new line of gay jokes. I have the constant fear of blurting out "last night I slept on a King Size Hasselback", and that is where the mocking starts. Hell, the only reason you people think it's funny is because you have known me for longer than 5 minutes and realize that not only is that possible, it is pretty damn likely. I will give you a second to giggle and nod as you think about it.
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It's only funny because it's true.

So anyway, this bed is huge. We need an elaborate system is pulleys, cranks, and carrier pigeons just to get the alarm clock set. Yep we have made it to the big time, or so I thought. If pillows were gold, the Wife's side of the bed would be Fort Knox. She has more pillows than Kim Jong-Il has high heeled shoes. We took 3 hours to find the correct mattress, this girl was the Goldilocks of mattressdom. And when she finally finds one "just right", we get it home and within 24 hours it's too hard! So what do we have to go buy? A pillow top for our new mattress. So now she is quite literally sleeping on a bed of pillows, and I am sleeping on what is literally the area of less than a twin size bed. And the punch line is that when she goes to bed, 15 minutes go by as she jams a pillow into every nook and crevice she can find. And then when she finds the right combination, she tells me to turn off the lamp. Which is on Her side of the bed! So now I have to climb over the top of a somewhat whiny mountain of goose feathers to get at the light. And the down side to all this? When her water breaks, we lose about $324 in pillows right there.

Attack of the Incredible Expanding Belly!!!

So, It's been a while since I last sat down to do this. Aga's bosses took off for a vacation and left their kids behind with her. So I have had a big empty spot next to me in bed. For some reason, while she is there I lay perfectly still at night. I have always attributed this to my time spent on a ship in the Navy. If you move too much there you fall out of your rack, because it is only slightly wider than you are. But with Aga out of our bed, I must have tunneled around in my sleep like some naked mole rat looking for her. I would end up waking with my head not even in the same time zone as where it started, covers strewn about and all the pillows on the floor.

The advantage to this, is that I am really able to see Maja growing. I know that Aga is going to get bigger, but I just wonder how? Where do her kidneys and things go? Is it some kind of March of the Penguins thing where all her internal organs leave the equatorial region and head to the poles? It's no wonder her eating habits have changed, her stomach just became close, intimate friends with her lower intestine. And the result has been picky little Aga eating anything. I don't mean to say that she eats a lot, more like she has only turned down cilantro. No really, thats it, just cilantro. We went to the Cheesecake Factory last night, where she had this chicken/mushroom/pasta dish. Now for years I have complained that my wife doesn't like flavor, that dish was actually very good, she topped it off with a good portion of a chopped veggie salad. This being the South I saw okra, cucumber, onions and all sorts of things that wouldn't have passed those lips 7 months ago. A dish I made was once labeled as tasting "too green". TOO GREEN?!!? What the heck does that mean? I can see too spicy/salty/garlicky/etc., but green is NOT a flavor that I am aware of. Imagine, if you will, that Nadia Comaneci is about to get her historic perfect 10 at the 1976 Montreal Olympics, but France holds up a scorecard that says "orange". You get what I'm saying?

Today we went to something called the "Taste of Marietta". It is a lot like the "Bite of Portland" except I had more fun here. It was definitely leaned toward the barbecued side of life, but that is quite all right. The only odd thing was that they had a tent where Domonique Wilkins was signing autographs. I ate like a fool, as in a round of sushi, fish taco's, grilled tri-tip, and beer. Aga has been in a quest for a good kielbasa ever since we moved here. While I am firmly in the belief that if it says "polish sausage", just keep walking sister, they can't even get the name right. So Aga's eyes glaze over as soon as she sees the sign, so she orders up one that is about as big as a tube of crest, covered in these onions that I couldn't have paid her to eat a short while ago. Yet for some reason she is eating those as well. I know that all I have been wanting for so long is someone that will eat anything with little to no alterations. And now that I have it, I stay pissed because I see she now has the capacity to do it all along. All that other crap was just empty posturing on her part that she can no longer get away with.

Cat Tossing 101

Hey all, This has been a week to be grateful for. Started out good, got better, then finished out fantastic. That's right, we're talking about a whole other level here. First off, I need to fill you in on a little back story.

We own a cat named Rigby, she is a sweet cat by all means, but at night she becomes somewhat.... annoying. Ok, Ok, amazingly annoying. To the point that she was once incarcerated overnight in the bathroom by some of the soon to be grandparents. Shortly after she was rolled up into the hide-a-bed as some kind of retribution by none other than my own father. I honestly find it hard to blame him. Due to this, we play a game with the cat in which she sneaks into the bedroom as we are getting ready for bed, and we then have to trick her into letting us catch her so we can put her out. Sounds simple, right? "Oh just keep the door shut" you might be saying. That cat will stay hiding for over two hours just to pop out after the lights go out. Strategy was what was needed in this case. We have had some great luck lately in that we worked up a tactic in which I would get into bed first and lure the cat out with some sensuous massage. Then Aga would come in and grab the cat and show her the door. After a while, the cat got hip to the idea and would try to bolt out of the way, but the Wife has some incredible cat wrangling skills, and would always make the grab. So the other night, I am working the magic on the cat and have her good and hypnotized, Aga goes for the grab... And finds out she can't bend the 90 degrees necessary to achieve full cat-capture. I don't know about her, but I love this pregnancy. Comedy Central should just start devoted a full night to nothing other than pissed off pregnant chicks... catching cats. I found myself cheering the cat on. It seemed that the only reason Rigby was even caught was that she was out of breathe from laughing at the sight of Aga's arms wildly swinging about 6 inches over her head.

That whole experience was like a gift from God, with a pretty bow on top. There really is only one thing that could make it better.

That's right, you've been RickRolled, bitches.

Maja's new photos!

What a cutie pie! but let me tell you, this girl is the most uncooperative child ever... not only did she not let us double check that she in fact is a "she" but she tried covering her face almost the entire time! We ended up with some good shots though and below is the link to the album. You can see how in some of those she is literally folded in half! Her legs are straight up on the left side of the frame and arms are folded on the right side. It's kinda cool but looks really uncomfortable :).
Stay tuned for week 34 updates :)

3D ultrasound April

Our crib and hutch

This is what we got but it's still at the warehouse until we decide where we want it delivered!

More pictures

We had some fun taking these after our Dr. visit. Click on the slideshow and it will take you to the online album.

24 week belly

Those 11 extra lbs since week 20 are showing :)

Finally a belly update!

This one is from about a month ago at 20 weeks...

Why?

Why are children's' toys inherently creepy? Last night, as we settled down for a nights rest and I was just on the verge of sleep. There was this high, mechanical "ha ha ha ha he he he he" that floated through the room causing my bladder to immediately hit the emergency evacuate button. Seems that there is this toy that we picked up for Maja that for no reason decided to start menacing us with it's little evil clowniness. After the third time Aga threw it in the closet. It should have made things better, but as we all know, there is quite simply nothing more terrifying than a laughing clown in the closet.

Until next time...

Finally the Kid is earning Her keep.

Hi All! So it has been a fun week or so, knowing about the baby GIRL has made things a lot more real for the two of us. On Monday we had an appointment at a baby day care center. Thats right, still have 5 months to go and we are having to look into this crap. Somehow there is a kind of Kool-Aid that we have been neglecting to drink because the waiting lists for these places are all starting at about a year and go up from there. What a scam! Quite a few of them treat it like you are applying to some Ivy League College and want to interview the Parents! Sometimes even the Kids themselves. I thought I saw it all with the Wedding Racket, But I have found that the Baby side of things is a much darker place. I swear that people are losing sight of the fact that these wonderful little kids are just KIDS. What is wrong with letting the little ones just be children without trying to make the parents feel that, unless they go to the "school" that has a chamomile potpourri scented nap time after a half hour yoga session, they will be forever damaging this child's chances at being successful in life. Of course there will be a fee, paid upfront of course, that covers said parents even being considered for their fine establishment.

So yeah we paid the fee, and actually the place we are signed up for is not nearly as bad as all that. I was very impressed because the place didn't smell like that sickening mix of syrup and baby powder that some how builds up whenever any more than 3 kids are in the immediate vicinity of each other. They even have a real Chef in there to cook the meals that are designed by a Nutritionist. Part of me says that just because you can chop celery into sticks and serve it with Jello does NOT make you a Chef. But hey, for the amount of money it will cost, I would feel stupid paying it to a place that only had a Celery-chopper and not a Chef.

The place has been open for 25 years, and for 20 of them there has been this parrot there. Not joking at all. Aga and I didn't even realize there was a bird there until we heard a beeping. Kind of like a cell phone with a missed call on it. Right behind us was this crusty old parrot, the staff introduced it as, and I quote "The Creepiest Bird Ever". If that bird was ever released it would find it's home in a dark ally trying to sell dirty pictures to small children and invalids. At one point I tried to make friends with the potential criminal. It just turned to look at me and gave me this sound that can only be described as the sound that that Dinosaur on Jurassic Park made right before it killed the Fat Guy from Seinfeld. You know the one I'm talking about.

The high point of the day, at least for me, came after we ate dinner. As we were driving home, Maja started kicking my wife in the bladder. We must have conceived the female Pele, because it seemed as if Maja was going for a corner kick during the FIFA finals. Aga was begging me to hurry up home before She started peeing everywhere. I was laughing so hard that I almost had to pull over. Best Kid Ever. She is definitely going to be Daddy's Little Girl.

Well, until next time, O'Neil.... Out

Duh!!

Pregnancy brain is taking its toll.... I forgot to mention the password to our registry!

It's: Maja

Sorry about that.

Baby Maja's Registry

Hello everyone. By popular demand, Aga has thrown up a link to the Baby Registry. She has found this website that basically makes a wish list from stuff we chose no matter what site it is from. Most sites we have chosen offer free shipping, but if anyone finds something on the list from somewhere else (cheaper/more convenient) it will give you an option to check it off it anonymously. Thanks to everybody for all your support, talk at ya later!

Maja's very first picture

This was taken back in December during our first Dr visit. 6 weeks and 5 days along- what a cute little Jellybean, isn't she?

Maja's latest photos

Kids, they NEVER listen...

So this is the continuation of the last post. Enjoy!

Aga and I had a nice trip to the doctors office today. It was time for the big sonogram where they check the babies measurements and can determine what is going on as far as cleft palates and other such things that might complicate things. I gotta say that every time someone has shown me their pictures from the sonogram, it is usually accompanied by a lot of head scratching while they attempt to tell me that this blobby thing is where it is waving at you. Somehow, this baby is in high def, because as soon as they turned on the little unit I was seeing all sorts of cool things. I correctly identified the brainstem, femur, and yes, I even called the kidneys. What neither Aga or I were counting on was the Vagina. We honestly were not wanting to know, but when we got the 3-d pictures done, we saw that in part of the video this baby appeared to have skipped the Irish Curse that has plagued his father, and had what I would have swore was a penis.

So naturally we have been operating on the assumption that Penis = Boy. Now we know we should have been thinking Penis = Umbilical Cord. The tech asked us if we wanted to know. We figured that we might as well make it official, as we were already shaping our purchasing around the fact that it was a boy. So the tech zooms in (on what I hope is the last time that unique camera angle is ever taken of my little girl) to what the professionals call the Hoo-Hah region. "Anyone got a guess on what that is?" she asks.

At this point it is no guess, I glanced at Aga to see someone completely speechless. See, She knew it was going to be a girl as soon as she knew we were pregnant. I might add that she knew we were pregnant before we ever had a positive test, the girl has one heck of a gut feeling. So for months she would swear up and down that it was a girl, until that 3-d picture came along. Now that she was seeing something other than a boy, it was taking a bit to sink in for her. My natural reaction was to get a case of the giggles.

So we are incredibly pleased to announce that we are going to bring one Maja Magdalena O'Neil into the world. She is completely healthy in every way. And as an additional bonus to an already spectacular day, we both got to feel her move about 5 minutes ago. Aga has been feeling her for sure for about 6 days, but nothing major enough for me. Until now, Aga called me in, I put the old bear paw on her stomache and felt my daughter saying Hi to her Daddy for the first time ever. This is truly the best day of my life so far. So I have got to go, see, the new Daddy is a bit emotional right now and is finding it hard to see the computer screen. Hope all is well with everyone, talk at you all later.

The Momma Don't Dance, But This Daddy Sure Does Rock and Roll

The last couple of weeks have been really exciting. We had a trip to French Canada, Land of the most delicious croissants I have ever had. I actually had what I like to refer to my Death Row Meal there. That spot used to be taken by Venison Breakfast Steaks and Eggs. Sorry Mom, but it is now Duck Confit. It is hard to explain what this is myself, So I will refer to that ever so useful site, Wikipedia.

Duck confit (French: confit de canard) is a French dish made with the leg of the duck. The confit is prepared in a centuries-old process of preservation that consists of salt curing a piece of meat (generally goose, duck, or pork) and then poaching it in its own fat.

Yummy. I can just hear Janel and Andy just having a collective WTF moment right now, but I swear that it is not in the least bit greasy. And it was SOOOO delicious I literally was on the edge of tears at the time.

I did a bunch of skiing on the mountain. That's right, I said skiing. I got there and started out snowboarding, and after a little bit decided that I have invested too much time on snow to be crashing that much. So I switched back to skiing and had a good time.

Aga, on the other hand, wasn't allowed to do a damn thing by her cruel and oppressive husband. The mere act of her walking around on the snowy ground was enough to keep me 2 inches from a complete nervous meltdown. I swear that I could invent some type of giant rigid cone type device thingy that she would have to wear to prevent any falls. I would make a zillion dollars overnight from protective dads the world over. What do I care if the mothership ends up looking like a giant weeble? As they say, Weebles Wobble but They Don't Fall Down (and damage the encased fetus of said over-protective father-to-be).

Speaking of being slightly overprotective. I have become like some sort of private secret service for my wife and spawn. It is almost a compulsion to get through the door first. Just in case there is some kind of threat that needs to be dealt with, like a terrorist, or some kind of Amway salesman. God help me when we go through a Mall. I turn into some kind of an overactive airport screener, I need to find where I can get one of those detector wands to speed up the process. In my mind I have just started profiling everybody who walks by too close. Old Lady? she's clear, Guy walking his dog? keep moving, dear god WE HAVE A POTHEAD!!!! Evacuate to the nearest Crate & Barrel, Stat! Intellectually I know I am being just a little bit nutty, but there is that little part of me that says no matter how small, there IS a chance that she could get hit by a stray meteor, and by god I will be there to keep it from happening.

As soon as I can figure out how, I am posting the video of who is easily the most psychotic tour guide We have ever met. We took a horse drawn sled ride in the snow for a ways. The horses were these amazing Percheron draft horses. I don't remember the names but what struck me was how small these things were. Granted, at 17 hands tall they weren't Shetland Ponies, but that is by no means a truly giant horse. But they pulled this huge sled like it was nothing through snow that was a couple of feet deep for about an hour and a half straight. So we started the ride with a total of 10 people on this sled, then this crazy SOB whips out a honest to god tiki mask and proceeds to tell the local "legend" of the mountain, all while staying in character. So a Crazy French-Canadian, holding a mask carved out of coconuts, telling Indian stories in temperatures approaching 0 degrees. It was just one of those situations that put me in what scientists call a "fight or flight reaction". Simply terrifying.

So this post is officially turning into a double header, as it is way too long. See you on the next post.

There might be 2 Maja's soon!

One of Aga's friends is due at the same time and just found out she is having a girl. A few weeks ago we saw her and her husband while they had a layover in Atlanta and turned out we all chose Maja for a girl. They are getting theirs :)... we will see what happens here, although with all the girls lately, this one is bound to be a boy!